stephawoosel
01-21-2009, 04:57 PM
Hi there.
I am a 21 year old college student with a paralyzing fear of driving.
I was diagnosed in 2006 with a moderate to severe anxiety disorder, which I had carried with me for a long time beforehand; it just never, it seems, had such a grandiose name. While this effects most aspects of my life (crowded situations, anxiety over school, etc.) the worst of my issues has been with driving.
Before i explain this, I must note that I have monocular vision, and am incapable of sight in my right eye. I am, however, capable of driving by US law, and received my license about a year ago -- the driving test woman even told me I drove wonderfully (nevermind my father and I driving the test route over and over so that I memorized it). I don't feel as confidant as that woman, my parents, and my ophthalmologists feel about my eyesight. My doctors, however, have advised me against driving in high-risk areas, and to avoid snow, heavy rain, or unfamiliar areas.
I think that most of all, I'm afraid to be in control. I don't want to be responsible for hitting someone, or hurting someone, or --god forbid-- killing someone. My boyfriend (who I live with) has been driving me to work only a TWO MINUTE DRIVE from our home, because I become so upset (crying, the shakes, etc.) that something terrible will happen. This has strained our relationship; in having to take care of me, and chauffeur me around, he has missed out on working more hours at HIS job, or being free to go off and enjoy his day rather than waiting for me to need him to bring me home.
I keep putting off driving. It has been 6 weeks since I last drove to work. I cried and shook the entire way there, even though the biggest challenge is turning into a shopping center across two lanes of traffic.
But I'm going to try to change. I am signing up for the first email session, and I purchased new fish eye mirrors for the sideview mirrors, and a much larger rearview mirror to compensate for my eyesight. My boyfriend and I are installing them as soon as he gets home, and then we are going to drive around the block. This might not seem like a big step, but it's something. I am already obsessing about it!
Stephanie.
I am a 21 year old college student with a paralyzing fear of driving.
I was diagnosed in 2006 with a moderate to severe anxiety disorder, which I had carried with me for a long time beforehand; it just never, it seems, had such a grandiose name. While this effects most aspects of my life (crowded situations, anxiety over school, etc.) the worst of my issues has been with driving.
Before i explain this, I must note that I have monocular vision, and am incapable of sight in my right eye. I am, however, capable of driving by US law, and received my license about a year ago -- the driving test woman even told me I drove wonderfully (nevermind my father and I driving the test route over and over so that I memorized it). I don't feel as confidant as that woman, my parents, and my ophthalmologists feel about my eyesight. My doctors, however, have advised me against driving in high-risk areas, and to avoid snow, heavy rain, or unfamiliar areas.
I think that most of all, I'm afraid to be in control. I don't want to be responsible for hitting someone, or hurting someone, or --god forbid-- killing someone. My boyfriend (who I live with) has been driving me to work only a TWO MINUTE DRIVE from our home, because I become so upset (crying, the shakes, etc.) that something terrible will happen. This has strained our relationship; in having to take care of me, and chauffeur me around, he has missed out on working more hours at HIS job, or being free to go off and enjoy his day rather than waiting for me to need him to bring me home.
I keep putting off driving. It has been 6 weeks since I last drove to work. I cried and shook the entire way there, even though the biggest challenge is turning into a shopping center across two lanes of traffic.
But I'm going to try to change. I am signing up for the first email session, and I purchased new fish eye mirrors for the sideview mirrors, and a much larger rearview mirror to compensate for my eyesight. My boyfriend and I are installing them as soon as he gets home, and then we are going to drive around the block. This might not seem like a big step, but it's something. I am already obsessing about it!
Stephanie.