panicmode
02-26-2009, 11:05 PM
I hate driving. I simply hate it. I won't drive anywhere if I can keep from it. Ugh. I need help!
For one thing, I'm 29. I have my drivers license, got that at 16 but haven't driven much since then. My problem is, I'm mostly blind in my left eye. My eye doctor says that people with limited vision drive all the time (great, that makes me feel better!) and that I'll never have any problems because my limited vision is something I've had since just after I was born, so I've always adapted to it.
Well, driving is one thing I feel like I really can't adapt to. And I'm not stupid. I have a master's degree and run a business! So I know I can learn the rules of the road. Sometimes when I'm riding with my husband, he'll obviously follow the rules and I'll ask myself "would I have reacted that way if I were driving?" Uhm. no. Because my mind would completely FREEZE.
I am terrified that there is something I don't see with my limited vision. Getting on interstates absolutely paralyzes me. Nine times out of 10 the onramp is leading up to cars coming from the LEFT which is the eye I don't see with. So I have to physically turn all the way around to see cars coming. And when they come toward me, I feel like I can't judge their depth and speed quickly enough to try and blend in. Oh, and do that while going 60 miles an hour. 0_o
A second reason for my fear of driving is, bless her heart, my mother. She's the one who taught me how to drive and she is an excellent and very safe driver. So you'd think I'd be fine, right? Noooo-o-o-o. Because when teaching me it was always like barking out orders. "speed up. slow down! watch out for that car 10 miles ahead. There's a stop light. wait. GO. STOP! Imagine a passenger saying that to you when you're trying to concentrate. I tried to tell her to be quiet and let me do it and only warn me if I was going to wreck but it never helped. I even bought her a backseat driver's license as a gag gift once.
And last but not least, I swear I have a problem with locations. Unless it's in the town I currently live in, I can't find anything. It's not that I don't pay attention, it's that when I'm driving, my mind blanks out and can't remember that the place we're going is the exact same place as when I was just a passenger in the car. My husband jokes with me that I've spent 29 years of my life in the same city and he's been here 5 years and knows his way around better than I do. On unfamiliar roads, it's like you have to remind me of ALL the rules of the road again. *sigh*
Why is this SO hard for me? I don't get it. I won't drive anywhere alone except to my parent's house. I won't even drive to the store alone. It's not that I have a panic attack when driving, it's just that I hate it so much I can't deal with it. HELP.
For one thing, I'm 29. I have my drivers license, got that at 16 but haven't driven much since then. My problem is, I'm mostly blind in my left eye. My eye doctor says that people with limited vision drive all the time (great, that makes me feel better!) and that I'll never have any problems because my limited vision is something I've had since just after I was born, so I've always adapted to it.
Well, driving is one thing I feel like I really can't adapt to. And I'm not stupid. I have a master's degree and run a business! So I know I can learn the rules of the road. Sometimes when I'm riding with my husband, he'll obviously follow the rules and I'll ask myself "would I have reacted that way if I were driving?" Uhm. no. Because my mind would completely FREEZE.
I am terrified that there is something I don't see with my limited vision. Getting on interstates absolutely paralyzes me. Nine times out of 10 the onramp is leading up to cars coming from the LEFT which is the eye I don't see with. So I have to physically turn all the way around to see cars coming. And when they come toward me, I feel like I can't judge their depth and speed quickly enough to try and blend in. Oh, and do that while going 60 miles an hour. 0_o
A second reason for my fear of driving is, bless her heart, my mother. She's the one who taught me how to drive and she is an excellent and very safe driver. So you'd think I'd be fine, right? Noooo-o-o-o. Because when teaching me it was always like barking out orders. "speed up. slow down! watch out for that car 10 miles ahead. There's a stop light. wait. GO. STOP! Imagine a passenger saying that to you when you're trying to concentrate. I tried to tell her to be quiet and let me do it and only warn me if I was going to wreck but it never helped. I even bought her a backseat driver's license as a gag gift once.
And last but not least, I swear I have a problem with locations. Unless it's in the town I currently live in, I can't find anything. It's not that I don't pay attention, it's that when I'm driving, my mind blanks out and can't remember that the place we're going is the exact same place as when I was just a passenger in the car. My husband jokes with me that I've spent 29 years of my life in the same city and he's been here 5 years and knows his way around better than I do. On unfamiliar roads, it's like you have to remind me of ALL the rules of the road again. *sigh*
Why is this SO hard for me? I don't get it. I won't drive anywhere alone except to my parent's house. I won't even drive to the store alone. It's not that I have a panic attack when driving, it's just that I hate it so much I can't deal with it. HELP.