cmc0813
04-03-2009, 08:46 AM
Hi all.
I'm not afraid of driving, but my girlfriend of five years is. I've harped on the importance of her learning, especially since we're in the US without comprehensive mass transit, but it seems she's only driven a few times to appease me. Once on a freeway where she did pretty well, but she's always very anxious and has never driven anywhere by herself.
I feel it's the only thing holding our relationship back, and I've told her that repeatedly over the five years we've been together. I've also explained how limiting it is to her career prospects and to us. But still, she seems paralyzed by this fear.
I guess deep down she knows all the things I've been telling her, but she's had an enabling family (very patriarchal father) and I guess I've enabled her too by moving closer to where she works (though I do like the neighborhood better, it's given her less and less reasons to drive and now she has a built-in excuse for not getting behind the wheel).
How do I get her to seek serious treatment? I love her deeply and she's truly my soulmate. But, the more and more I think about getting older, having children and being the only functioning driver, the more it seems very limiting if we have to look for houses only on the bus lines or in cities with great/safe mass transit. I even gave up a decent promotion in a smaller city with less mass transit so we could stay together.
She's 28 and has never owned a car.
Can anyone give me any suggestions?
I'm not afraid of driving, but my girlfriend of five years is. I've harped on the importance of her learning, especially since we're in the US without comprehensive mass transit, but it seems she's only driven a few times to appease me. Once on a freeway where she did pretty well, but she's always very anxious and has never driven anywhere by herself.
I feel it's the only thing holding our relationship back, and I've told her that repeatedly over the five years we've been together. I've also explained how limiting it is to her career prospects and to us. But still, she seems paralyzed by this fear.
I guess deep down she knows all the things I've been telling her, but she's had an enabling family (very patriarchal father) and I guess I've enabled her too by moving closer to where she works (though I do like the neighborhood better, it's given her less and less reasons to drive and now she has a built-in excuse for not getting behind the wheel).
How do I get her to seek serious treatment? I love her deeply and she's truly my soulmate. But, the more and more I think about getting older, having children and being the only functioning driver, the more it seems very limiting if we have to look for houses only on the bus lines or in cities with great/safe mass transit. I even gave up a decent promotion in a smaller city with less mass transit so we could stay together.
She's 28 and has never owned a car.
Can anyone give me any suggestions?