Agoraphobia and OCD - I feel as if I am forcing myself to be afraid.

[river_one]

After much research and inner seeking I have come to the conclusion that I suffer from both agoraphobia and Obsessive–compulsive disorder. I imagine that they are connected and one leads to the other.

As I have mentioned in previous posts, my driving fears are the greatest on the wide open roads where there is plenty of room to maneuver. Wheres in more confined situations like in city driving I am much more at ease and can drive much faster with good feeling of control. This seems to fit Agoraphobia like a glove.

The Obsessive–compulsive disorder I observe in the same situations like driving on the wide open roads I feel that I am forcing myself to hit the breaks, obsessively look in the rear view mirror and bare strongly to the right driving in the shoulder of the road. All of those actions bring on the fear and not the other way around. I am not slowing down because I feel a fear, I am slowing down because something inside is telling me to do so in such and such situation and then I look in the mirror and start feeling in-secure and bring the fear on.

I feel as if I am forcing myself to be afraid.

[Cali1989]

I applaud you for driving period! I still can't even do that, I understand how you feel when you said you feel that your forcing yourself to be afraid. I feel that I may be doing that as well. I posted a post on here talking about how my mind will tell me everything I need to do, but when I try or even want to drive, I freeze up and end up doing nothing. It's like my body will not match up with my mind. It's going to take a long time for me to really conquer my fear and anxiety of driving.